Can’t write? I’ve been there: Understanding why My Words Have Gone Quiet. You Are Not Alone

You sit down to write—and nothing happens. No spark. No pull. Just a quiet, heavy nothing where the words used to live.

If you’ve been wondering what’s wrong with you, let me say this first: nothing is broken. Not being able to write doesn’t mean you’ve lost your talent or your identity as a writer. It means something inside you is asking to be understood.

I have heard it said, and I am paraphrased, you know you are a writer when you spend more time feeling guilty about not writing than you write. We all giggle about that, because it hits a chord for writers. While misery loves company, this saying does nothing to help us reverse and start writing more then we feel guilt, and to be honest I only feel more guilty when I hear this.

If you know me from my writing world and social media, you know that I haven’t been doing a ton of writing related activity for a while now. It isn’t that I don’t want to write and do writerly things. It isn’t that I am done being a writer either. I have stories to write. A series to finish, even. So, why can’t I just gird my loins and get it done?

As a Historical Romance Author, I understand my readers and all readers of the genre

are there because they need a happily-ever-after. For many of our readers we are their escape from whatever is going on in their world that may not feel so good or that is scary or out of their control. I’m a reader, I get that. When I pick up a novel, I want to be transported to this place where all bad things turn out good, and love conquers all.

Being a writer of Happy Endings is a dream job, don’t get me wrong. I have been given the opportunity by the people in my life and the writing world at large to do this thing that is totally frivolous, decadent, and makes people smile. The problem for me currently, is you can’t write a romance while you are trying to grin and bear it through your day-to-day.

I have been suffering from burnout, and PTSD symptoms for over a year now. It isn’t a big traumatic event; it is many small ones. Some of them include being the national president of Romance Writers of America for over two years and helping to navigate the organization through a restructuring plan. I am so proud of what the national board accomplished in those years I was president. And now RWA is stronger than ever, but when I stepped down after my term was up, my brain decided it needed a break. There were also other more personal things contributing to my stress. When it was over, I gave myself a couple of months to just enjoy not having anyone depend on me to make decisions or do anything other than wake up and be. Unfortunately, after that break, I couldn’t get back into it. I would try and get words down, but then I would be exhausted for days after, until I just avoided it all together.

The world we live in is not conducive to artists and creatives. What makes us thrive is often not what is put in front of us to handle. And it got to the point for me that I wondered what was even the point? My little romance novels did not change the world. They didn’t even pay my electric bill on a regular basis. No one cares about such silly things. And here’s the biggest whopper my brain dumped on me. I’m not even a very good writer, so I just put out bad books anyway.

Most of that paragraph is bullshit. I can see that on a cognitive level. I am my own proof that humans need to have places to escape to when it gets dark outside. I have spent most of my time in the past year bingeing not only historical romance, but Romantasy as well. I am proof that little romance novels got me through my days without losing total hope in humanity, yet I was unable to put that knowledge into perspective that I am that retreat for other readers.

I have been in therapy which is where I got the burnout and PTSD titles, and it is helping, but now I have the fear of just starting again. What has helped me is to interact with other writers and readers. I attended a book signing in December, that truth be told I wasn’t feeling too excited about. I had nothing new to offer and imposter syndrome is strong in me, but I paid for the table, so I went. Everyone was lovely as usual. I got to see writers, friends and some readers who I see at all the signings. One reader walked up to my table with a spread sheet on her phone and said these are all the books of yours I have, what should I read next?

Even telling this story now, I am getting teary eyed, because I had a reader that not only read more than one of my books, but I was important enough in her reading journey, that she added me to a spreadsheet and she wanted to read more. Then after the event, I was tagged in an Instagram reel of a reader who showed the books she purchased and was excited to read and one of my books was in her video. This was the universe reminding me that my books are to some readers like the books I read are to me. They bring joy.

As a writer, please remember that if you commercially publish your stories are relevant in your readers’ lives. They may not solve the world’s problems, they may not be academic, but they matter. You matter.

The big lesson I wanted everyone to take away from this post is that if you need to be quiet and not write, do what you need to do, but don’t ever say it’s been too long to go back to writing. What I write or want to write has no relevance so why bother? When you are ready to sit back down and put words on the page, know that only you can tell the story in a way that will impact your readers and that is who you are writing for. Try not to be too precious about the outcome. The words are what matter today. Tomorrow you can worry about making them pretty. You are a writer and will be a writer again. Give yourself grace and time. Eat well, get some nature, find people that make you feel cared for, and when it is time, you will write again. In this world it is ok to take a break.

If this post resonated, you might find comfort in knowing what to do instead of writing during this season. In the next post, I share five meaningful things you can do while your words are resting—without guilt or pressure.

I have faith in you. You got this. Happy word spewing!

Clair